Archive for December, 2008

Texas Test

Tuesday, December 23rd, 2008

A third grade teacher at a Texas  elementary school, in an effort to prepare her students for the all-important TAKS test, compiled an exam consisting of 20 questions, which she administered to her class. The exam purposely covered a broad array of topics.

Question # 1

LIST, IN ANY ORDER, THE FOUR SEASONS:
1. ________  2. ________ 3.________  4. ________

Can you possibly imagine that 67% of the students gave the following answer?

1. DOVE SEASON     2. DEER SEASON    3. DUCK SEASON    4.  TURKEY SEASON

Texas children are brought up knowing the important things in life.

Play Doctor

Monday, December 15th, 2008

Terrible Tommy was talking to his girl friend. He said, “Let’s play doctor. You operate and I’ll sue.”

English

Monday, December 15th, 2008

English is spoken by 334 million people in
Akrotiri, American Samoa, Anguilla, Antigua and Barbuda, Argentina, Aruba, Australia, Bahamas, The, Bahrain, Bangladesh, Barbados, Belize, Bermuda, Botswana, Brazil, British Virgin Islands, Brunei, Cambodia, Cameroon, Canada, Cayman Islands, Christmas Island, Cocos (Keeling) Islands, Cook Islands, Costa Rica, Cyprus, Denmark, Dhekelia, Dominica, Egypt, Ethiopia, Falkland Islands (Islas Malvinas), Fiji, Gambia, The, Gaza Strip, Ghana, Gibraltar, Greece, Greenland, Grenada, Guam, Guernsey, Guyana, Hong Kong, Iceland, India, Indonesia, Ireland, Isle of Man, Israel, Jamaica, Jersey, Jordan, Kenya, Kiribati, Korea, South, Kuwait, Laos, Lebanon, Lesotho, Liberia, Libya, Madagascar, Malaysia, Maldives, Malta, Marshall Islands, Mauritius, Micronesia, Federated States of, Monaco, Montserrat, Namibia, Nauru, Nepal, Netherlands Antilles, New Zealand, Nicaragua, Nigeria, Niue, Norfolk Island, Northern Mariana Islands, Oman, Pakistan, Palau, Panama, Papua New Guinea, Philippines, Pitcairn Islands, Puerto Rico, Qatar, Rwanda, Saint Barthelemy, Saint Helena, Saint Kitts and Nevis, Saint Lucia, Saint Martin, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, Samoa, Seychelles, Sierra Leone, Singapore, Solomon Islands, Somalia, South Africa, Sri Lanka, Sudan, Suriname, Swaziland, Switzerland, Syria, Tanzania, Thailand, Timor-Leste, Tokelau, Tonga, Trinidad and Tobago, Turks and Caicos Islands, Tuvalu, Uganda, United Arab Emirates, United Kingdom, United States, Vanuatu, Vietnam, Virgin Islands, West Bank, Zambia, and Zimbabwe.

Spanish  or Castillian Spanish is spoken in Argentina, Aruba, Belize, Bolivia, Brazil, Chile, Colombia, Costa Rica, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, El Salvador, Equatorial Guinea, Gibraltar, Guatemala, Honduras, Mexico, Netherlands Antilles, Nicaragua, Panama, Paraguay, Peru, Puerto Rico, Saint Martin, Spain, Switzerland, Trinidad and Tobago, United States, Uruguay, Venezuela, and Virgin Islands.

Why in the heck should we in the USA, have to ‘press 1’ to speak English?

Light me up

Thursday, December 11th, 2008

Blue streetlights are believed to be useful in preventing suicides and street crime, a finding that is encouraging an increasing number of railway companies to install blue light-emitting apparatus at stations to prevent people from committing suicide by jumping in front of trains. Although experts are split over the effectiveness of the blue lights, railway companies that already have installed the lighting say they have played a successful role in preventing suicides.

Glasgow, Scotland, introduced blue streetlighting to improve the city’s landscape in 2000. Afterward, the number of crimes in areas illuminated in blue noticeably decreased.

The Nara, Japan, prefectural police set up blue street lights in the prefecture in 2005, and found the number of crimes decreased by about 9 percent in blue-illuminated neighborhoods. Many other areas nationwide have followed suit.

Shameless Self Promotion

Thursday, December 11th, 2008

I usually don’t do this, but I have to admit I am a bit surprised. One of my latest books ‘Medical Humor’ is selling very well on Amazon. Go check it out and do a ‘search inside’ to get a flavor of the funny side of medicine. You can also see details at my other web site http://www.funnyshubhub.com

BTW – leave a comment. Let me know someone is out there reading this stuff. Thanks